Things that go hump in the night
If you’ve been watching TV or have walked into a bookstore lately you’ve probably noticed the alarming number of teeny vampire stories milling about. They’re called ‘Vampire Romances’, a relatively new genre that seems to have exploded out of nowhere. This isn’t the case of course; stories with vampire lovers in them have been around forever. It’s just lately that they’ve drifted into the mainstream and onto our radar. Just type ‘vampire romance’ into your search engine and you’ll see what I mean.
So why the sudden popularity boost? If they’ve always been there lurking in the shadows what’s made them so popular all of a sudden? Well, in my opinion the commercialisation of vampire romance popped up because it fills a void that was previously filled by Hospital Dramas. They’ve got everything we’ve been missing; suspense, drama, sexual tension and most importantly, blood and gore. Grey’s Anatomy can only do so much.
Whilst there is nothing new about vampire stories these ‘new and improved’ vampires differ quite dramatically from the old folklore vampires. The most marked difference being that they seem to be allowed outside much more than before which means they get to try out for the football team and stuff. They used to come from Romania and live in castles but now they go to high school and drive Volvos. They used to be scary but now they’re sexy. They used to be the stuff of nightmares. Now they’re dreamy. It’s not too bigger leap to make though, any woman will tell you that scary is sexy…just look at Bram Stoker’s Dracula. It was just a matter of time before the tweens cottoned on.
So we’ve established the tweeny vampire romance seems to be quite different from the adult kind. I’ve therefore compiled a list of things to watch out for. Remember: if you spot any of the following you know you’re watching either Twilight, True Blood, The Vampire Diaries, or Vampire Academy….or possibly all four. Slowly and calmly pick up the remote and change the channel.
1. The male lead (vampire) will be the moody, strong but silent type usually resentful of his vampire status which will inevitably result in an argument when the female lead wants to be ‘turned’.
2. The female lead (human) will be earth shatteringly beautiful but completely unaware of the fact. She’ll usually be a bit of a loner as well and feels like she ‘just doesn’t fit in’.
3. After the initial novelty of vampirism has worn off be prepared for the introduction of werewolves.
4. There’s a love triangle. These are incredibly important as it helps to highlight rule no. 2 and you know…everyone loves a good love triangle. This rule almost always applies–I haven’t read Vampire Academy but judging by the books I have read by Richelle Meade I’m fairly sure there’s a love triangle in there somewhere.
